Judgement – The Best Laid Plans....
by Commander Chelsea Dunham & Lieutenant Jana Kasikova
Post Details
ON:
The next morning, Ben and Jana got up and sat at breakfast, an electric air of anticipation between them. Today was going to be the day they would find out if Jana's plan was feasible or not. They both had mixed feelings. Over their eggs florentine, loving replicated by Ben with a flourish and a whole story about how he'd had to go to some exotic planet to fetch the ingredients, they had laughed at the ridiculousness of his tale.
Ben loved to make Jana laugh. She always flashed those awesome eyes, tossing her head softly, her long cascade of dark hair rippling in an enticing way around her shoulders. He finished his breakfast, drank his coffee and then folded his hands in his lap.
"Ready?" he asked gently.
"Only if you are." She smiled nervously at him. Jana got up and cleared the dishes from the fabulous breakfast. "Thank you for breakfast...and the wonderful tale that with it." She smiled again.
They walked down the corridor on their way to sickbay, Jana's arm linked with Ben's. The last couple of days had been nothing but an emotional rollercoaster. She had nothing but love for everything that Ben had done for her, she leaned into him and squeezed his arm affectionately. ~I love you.~ She thought to herself, even with everything that had happened between them Jana still didn't have the courage to tell him that she loved him.
Ben sensed she was tense about something, a little nervous perhaps about an unspoken concern but then, considering what they were about to undertake, who wouldn't be? He dismissed it as part of the natural anticipation about their interview with Chelsea about the 'E's - embryo and ethics.
When they reached Sickbay, Ben took Jana's hand from the crook of his elbow, squeezed it encouragingly and let her into Chelsea's office confidently.
Chelsea looked up from the interminable Padds and smiled. "Hey you two!" She was genuinely pleased to see them both and immediately pushed the padds back, making a bee-line for the replicator.
"Good timing! Perfect moment for a beverage. What's your poison?" she smiled, waiting to order them a drink.
Ben let Jana choose first. "Honey?" he prompted gently.
"Black tea, with some honey please." She smiled and took a seat. "How are you Chelsea? I haven't really seen you lately."
"I'm well Jana, thank you. How about you?" Chelsea responded, looking at Ben who replied simply. "Coffee please, Terran, hot, black, sweet."
Chelsea produced the drinks and one for herself and sat down on the sofa and chairs with them as this clearly wasn't just a social call, judging by the nervous look on Ben's normally laid back expression.
"My friend, Dr. Melanie Hemmingway, was killed while on duty. She left me this for me." She handed Chelsea the PADD that revealed Melanie's plans for her embryo. "I have done research...Betazoids and human physiology is similiar enough that I could carry her child as she has asked of me."
"Carry....." Chelsea took the Padd and began to read. "I.... this is.... unprecedented in my entire career." she said at last, her jaw almost on the floor as she read further and further down. She looked up suddenly at Ben as a realisation began to dawn. Ben flushed, looking instinctively down at the floor to avoid her scrutiny but then after a moment to recover his composure, he looked back, confidently steady and resolved, his eyes meeting those of his friend and mentor. There was an exchange of something, a form of understanding perhaps. A question posed and answered silently without judgement.
"There are a lot of ethics here to consider, Jana" Chelsea turned to the Chief of Science with a very serious look on her face but not an unkind one.
"Not to mention a whole semester of Medical points to raise and explain." It was Jana's turn to fall under the scrutiny of the Chief Medical Officer's searching gaze.
"What am I supposed to do Chelsea? This is what Melanie wanted if something happened to her and it did..." She met her friend's gaze. Jana knew that she had her back up about the issue..."Please Chelsea...tell me what to do."
"I cannot do that, Jana. You know I can't. Only you and you alone can decide to initiate a life and take on all the responsibilities that will snowball out of that one gesture of loyalty and kindness to your friend. You know what you owe her, but DO you know what you owe her child. It is totally different, you know" Chelsea was playing Devil's Advocate here, it was her job to make sure Jana first, and then later Ben, had considered every possible angle. She was not allowed, under any circumstances whatsoever, to allow her own feelings to come into this, nor even to be seen or guessed at.
Jana looked down at her hands that gripped her cup of tea and nodded. "I owe the child a chance to be loved, to know who their parents were and how much they loved him or her, to know a life that should be lived to the fullest. I will love the child as if it were of my own blood. Please Chelsea test me to make sure that I can do this? I promise to give it a month to seriously think about this before I let my emotions make the decision for me."
"That sounds sensible" Chelsea commented. "On that basis, with a month to go into all the ins and outs, then I agree that at the end of that time, providing we have covered all the ethics with the Counsellor and all the legalities with JAG as well as some medical details too."
~JAG? Counsellor and Ethics?~ She thought to herself and looked at Ben for reassurance. Jana knew that this would be difficult but not to this extent. "Let's just get the testing done shall we? I enjoy your company Chelsea but I am sure you have more important things to do and I really don't want to keep you."
Chelsea knew an exit line when she heard one. She shrugged and smiled and patted a bio-bed indicating that Jana should climb aboard. Once she was lying down, the med arch was activated and the tests began. Chelsea just had to program in a few prompts and a whole screen of readouts began to scroll through. Suddenly Chelsea's soft Bajoran ridges creased together in surprise.
"Um... okay, this is going to throw a spanner in the works." she said, pressing buttons that lifted the arch stopping the whole procedure mid-run. "I have good news and bad news, I'm afraid. Which one do you want first?"
Jana sat up, afraid she grabbed Ben's hand and sat up. Good news and bad news...she didn't like the sound of that...what could it possibly be? "I'm guessing the bad...is...I can't carry Melanie's baby..." Jana looked up at Chelsea and resigned herself to the news, tears swam in her eyes, she would not be able to fulfill her best friend's last wish. "What is the good news then?" She asked.
"The reason why..... that's the good news. Well, I hope it is. You can't carry the foetus because you are already carrying one of your own. Jana you're pregnant." Chelsea spoke the stunning words softly, placing her hand over Jana's gently.
Ben stood stock still, the blood draining from his face as he sat down hard, almost missing the chair.
"I'm what?" She asked. "How far along?" She tried counting back to her last cycle but her mind was spinning. Jana groaned and fell back against the bed, covering her face with her hands. "Chelsea...I need you to run a DNA scan." She said through her hands, she was completely embarrassed having to say that. It could possibly be Thomas' child, she prayed it was Ben's but there was still the chance. "I'm sorry Ben." She whispered.
Chelsea looked at Ben who was clearly bewildered. "Of course" she replied gently, pushing the appropriate *buttons* to run blood tests. "I think we're looking at very early indeed. Perhaps only a couple of weeks, maybe less."
As Chelsea mentioned a 'couple' of weeks, Ben's face seemed to take on a glimmer of something like understanding, like a light bulb coming on. In her own head, even Chelsea was doing the math. Ben had arrived on Stardate 22 - fourteen days ago but even 'he' couldn't surely be 'that' much of a fast worker.
This embryo was so under-developed it was almost off the bottom end of the scale of detectable, in former centuries, medicine would have been too primitive to even recognise the fact that an egg had been fertilised and embedded. It was micro-science at this stage.
Chelsea thought about asking who else's DNA she should run as it would save time to know who she was looking to eliminate but then again, she decided this was delicate enough as it was. She made a start with Ben's. If it wasn't his, then they could ask more questions, but only if it were absolutely necessary.
The blood scan came up without a result. The only DNA in Jana's blood was her own.
"Jana, I'm sorry. It's too early to tell. I'm going to have to wait until the embryo gets large enough and secure enough for a direct test." She realised how difficult this was going to be but she couldn't risk a direct interference with a newly forming life whilst it was barely more than a few rapidly multiplying cells.
"If I try to test such a newly formed, barely embedded foetus itself - especially at such a critical stage, it could become dislodged before the connection it is currently making becomes secure enough." She explained carefully to the shocked couple. She could see the misery this was causing them both but her hands were tied by the frailty of the tiny life, barely more than a few cells, struggling to grow into a sentient being.
"Basically, it could cause a miscarriage if I test the foetus itself. I've tried blood from your own body Jana and we can do that again in a couple of weeks, perhaps even coming from arteries from behind the womb-wall next time, but again, we HAVE to be agonisingly careful not to upset the delicate balance so early on. This is too delicate and the odds are too high that something could go wrong."
Chelsea spoke quietly and gently, these were both medically and scientifically trained experts, they knew all that she was saying before she was even spelling it out but in a situation that was so emotive, shock often made even the most intelligent brains reach desperately for things they wouldn't normally even consider.
"I *know* you wouldn't ask me, and you know I could never agree anyway, to risk harm to the child no matter what." It was a rhetorical statement, not even a question. They didn't need to answer. None of the three of them would ever dream of taking the risk.
"We have to be patient, there's no reason to jump to conclusions." She said specifically to Ben as she passed him, placing her hand on his shoulder as a friend who cares, making eye contact just before she left the two of them alone for a private moment.
Ben looked up, his eyes still seemed glazed but there was a glimmer of recognition of the reassurance she was offering. He knew he could count on her, whatever happened. They had been friends long enough over the past two postings and they had been through enough as colleagues as well, to have become close. He took encouragement from her hand on his shoulder. She was telling him this was going to be something he could get through.
~She's right~ he thought to himself, tearing his eyes from those of his good friend and looking over at the woman he hadn't looked at for a full five minutes since his world had soared to heights of joy and then crashed to depths of misery in what had seemed like two heartbeats.
Jana wasn't looking at him, she seemed to be avoiding his gaze at first but then she looked up and Ben felt all the universe spin. Her lovely face was torn with emotion and her hair fell around it, framing it with waves of wild darkness. He reached out instinctively, drawn to touch it by some force he could have done nothing to resist and smoothed the most wayward strands back from her exquisite ivory skin, his fingers brushing her cheek as he hooked the curl behind her delicate ear.
Her cheek was wet to his touch and as he leaned towards her, their eyes met.
Jana burst into tears the moment their eyes locked. She flinched as she waited for the verbal onslaught to begin, waiting to be called every name in the book but he simply looked at her, compassion in his eyes. "I'm so sorry Ben..." She wrapped her arms around him and held him close to her when the yelling didn't start. She was distraught by the pain that she had caused him. How could she ever make it up to him? Would this be how they parted? Jana was confused by his reaction, why wasn't he yelling and screaming at her and calling her a whore? She had obviously slept with two men close enough together that she even thought that of herself. Was he waiting until they were back in her quarters or his before he let loose on her?
A million thoughts ran through her mind as he held her and stroked her hair. He held her until she had no more tears to shed. "Ben...I promise, I didn't cheat on you." She whispered against his neck. "I had been alone for so long after Damon's death and I needed to feel real...it was before you and I had even met..."
"Jana........ " his voice was soft as he pulled gently back and looked at her pale face, her eyes, red with tears but still the most amazing eyes in the universe, deep, full of everything he ever wanted. "I have only one thing to say and then we'll never discuss it again, ok?"
~Oh great! Here it comes!~ She thought to herself, Jana was about to lose the one person in her life that meant anything to her. Fresh tears brimmed her eyes and she looked away from him until he began to speak.
He got out a hanky, struggling a little as he didn't want to let her go. He let her get herself calm as he dried her tear stained cheeks. "I know it isn't my call, but I don't want you to have a DNA test." She looked shocked but before she could reply he held up his finger and put it against her lips in a shh gesture.
"Jana, I love you, this is *our* child and I don't care about whoever *he* was, you're with me now and he's lost you, that's his tough luck. I don't need to know who he is, i just want you to be able to look me in the eyes and say you can forget him and love me now." She seemed to be bursting to reply but he kept his finger on her lips as he avoided her eyes for a few more seconds. He began to struggle to reach into his pockets again, the same as he had when he was fetching the hanky out.
"I was saving this for later but I want to marry you Jana." he pulled out a box with an engagement ring inside. "Will you do me the honour of making me the happiest man in the universe by becoming my wife?" having got this out, his hand shaking, he finally looked into her eyes.
".... and please can we forget the DNA test on *our* baby?" he added hurriedly, his cheeks a little pink from sneaking that in such an underhand way.
Jana looked at him in shock, she was still trying to process everything that he said when he took out the ring. She stared at the ring, ~what just happened?~ She asked herself, there was a step missing and she was confused. Damon would of thrown her out on her ass had she told him that there was the possibility he wasn't the father of the child she was carrying and here Ben was proposing to her. Had she stepped into an alternate reality? She hadn't had luck with men...even when she was engaged and was supposed to marry them...but Damon had died and Ben wasn't Damon...
She looked at him, really looked at him and saw that Ben was completely serious. Jana saw nothing but love in his eyes, he looked at her differently than Damon ever did. ~STOP IT!~ She scolded herself. Ben was not Damon...he would never turn into Damon and she had to stop comparing the two of them.
"Yes, Ben....I will marry you." She wrapped her arms around him and pulled him close to her. "I promise to love you and forget about the rest." She whispered in his ears. "I love you."
That was all Ben needed to hear. He hugged her so tightly against him that after a few moments he had to check if she was still breathing. He grinned at her like a Cheshire cat. " Mr and Mrs Benjamen Kensington... and their baby, George!" he teased. "How does that sound, Mrs K?"
"Not George! Please not George!" She laughed. "Besides, what if our baby is a girl? We can't exactly be calling her George." Jana looked at the ring and then back up at him. "Mr. Kensington...do I have to put the ring on myself? I thought traditionally the male of the species did that..."
"Yes we can... we can call her Georgia.... what's wrong with George?" Ben pretended to be serious about the name as he took the hint and removed the ring from the box. It was a Czech sapphire set within a ring of diamonds, exactly as she had described her mother's but with a blue gem rather than the red one her mother had. He hoped she would like it. It was a bit of a risk going so close to one that already held a significant sentimental meaning but she had described the other one with such admiration. He slipped it on her delicate finger, as she held up her left hand. Kissing her with a gentle sincerity, he whispered. "It's okay, we can call her Henri... if you don't like George" Grinning he ducked an incoming whack and gently caught her hand.
"How about Dragana if it a girl?" She said laughing again. Jana pulled her hand back and looked at the ring. "It's just like mami's." Jana smiled and realised that he was in fact listening when she spoke of her mother's ring. "I love the ring Ben! It reminds me of home."
Ben grinned happily. ~Result!~ he congratulated himself silently.
"Can we tell Chelsea?" he asked Jana, looking towards the door that the CMO had gone out through.
"Of course." Jana smiled warmly and hopped off the bed, she took his hand and went back into Chelsea's office. "Chelsea?...we have decided not to do the DNA test...and..." She raised her left hand to show her friend the most exciting news.
Chelsea looked at the ring and smiled broadly. "That's the best news!" she exclaimed and came round the desk to hug them both.
"Congratulations! This calls for a celebratory coffee.... sorry, i'm on duty, but we can get something stronger later.... well, Ben and I can... you're off alcohol for 9 mths, missy!" she grinned.
"I will have decaf then." Jana smiled. "I promise, no alcohol. How about the four of go out tonight and have some dinner? "
"That's a great idea!!" Ben was full on. "Awesome.... What do you think Che... boss? Come ON.. we have so much to celebrate.... what about a joint wedding?? I can't wait.... what time tonight.... 7.30? Shall we go to the box?"
"Woooah!!!!!!" Chelsea had to put her hands on his shoulders to slow him down.
"NO.... nothing personal, but as much as i adore you both, a double wedding is out of the question. I want to be matron of honour at yours... not someone who has an agenda of her own. If that's okay? But dinner.. okay... i'll speak to Rick and see what his shifts are like." she grinned.
"Only if I am yours." Jana smiled back. "Ben, my love....I don't want a double wedding either. Double dates fine...but I want our own ceremony...I have a lot of planning to do! "
Chelsea gave a sigh of relief and Ben shrugged. "Okay, no worries." He agreed without any fuss. It didn't matter to him if the girls didn't want it.
"About that, Jana.. I said I'd like to be your matron of honour and of course I'd be honoured if you wanted that, but I have to confess I've already asked Isha to be mine. I'm very sorry. I'd understand totally if you had a difference choice too." Chelsea explained.
Jana waved off Chelsea. "I know you have been planning yours a lot longer. Of course you can be my Matron of Honour. You are the one that got us together afterall, I wouldn't have it any other way." She smiled and hugged Chelsea. "Thank you Chelsea...for everything." She smiled, her eyes wet once again with tears but this time with happy tears.
OFF:
A JP between:
Lt. Jana Kasikova
CSO - DS5
and
Lt Ben Kensington
ACMO - DS5
(NPC by jools)
by Commander Chelsea Dunham & Lieutenant Jana Kasikova
Post Details
| Title | The Best Laid Plans.... | |
| Mission | Judgement | |
| Author(s) | Commander Chelsea Dunham & Lieutenant Jana Kasikova | |
| Posted | Tue Nov 16, 2010 @ 10:35pm | |
| Location | Sickbay | |
| Timeline | Sd36 - 00:80 |
The next morning, Ben and Jana got up and sat at breakfast, an electric air of anticipation between them. Today was going to be the day they would find out if Jana's plan was feasible or not. They both had mixed feelings. Over their eggs florentine, loving replicated by Ben with a flourish and a whole story about how he'd had to go to some exotic planet to fetch the ingredients, they had laughed at the ridiculousness of his tale.
Ben loved to make Jana laugh. She always flashed those awesome eyes, tossing her head softly, her long cascade of dark hair rippling in an enticing way around her shoulders. He finished his breakfast, drank his coffee and then folded his hands in his lap.
"Ready?" he asked gently.
"Only if you are." She smiled nervously at him. Jana got up and cleared the dishes from the fabulous breakfast. "Thank you for breakfast...and the wonderful tale that with it." She smiled again.
They walked down the corridor on their way to sickbay, Jana's arm linked with Ben's. The last couple of days had been nothing but an emotional rollercoaster. She had nothing but love for everything that Ben had done for her, she leaned into him and squeezed his arm affectionately. ~I love you.~ She thought to herself, even with everything that had happened between them Jana still didn't have the courage to tell him that she loved him.
Ben sensed she was tense about something, a little nervous perhaps about an unspoken concern but then, considering what they were about to undertake, who wouldn't be? He dismissed it as part of the natural anticipation about their interview with Chelsea about the 'E's - embryo and ethics.
When they reached Sickbay, Ben took Jana's hand from the crook of his elbow, squeezed it encouragingly and let her into Chelsea's office confidently.
Chelsea looked up from the interminable Padds and smiled. "Hey you two!" She was genuinely pleased to see them both and immediately pushed the padds back, making a bee-line for the replicator.
"Good timing! Perfect moment for a beverage. What's your poison?" she smiled, waiting to order them a drink.
Ben let Jana choose first. "Honey?" he prompted gently.
"Black tea, with some honey please." She smiled and took a seat. "How are you Chelsea? I haven't really seen you lately."
"I'm well Jana, thank you. How about you?" Chelsea responded, looking at Ben who replied simply. "Coffee please, Terran, hot, black, sweet."
Chelsea produced the drinks and one for herself and sat down on the sofa and chairs with them as this clearly wasn't just a social call, judging by the nervous look on Ben's normally laid back expression.
"My friend, Dr. Melanie Hemmingway, was killed while on duty. She left me this for me." She handed Chelsea the PADD that revealed Melanie's plans for her embryo. "I have done research...Betazoids and human physiology is similiar enough that I could carry her child as she has asked of me."
"Carry....." Chelsea took the Padd and began to read. "I.... this is.... unprecedented in my entire career." she said at last, her jaw almost on the floor as she read further and further down. She looked up suddenly at Ben as a realisation began to dawn. Ben flushed, looking instinctively down at the floor to avoid her scrutiny but then after a moment to recover his composure, he looked back, confidently steady and resolved, his eyes meeting those of his friend and mentor. There was an exchange of something, a form of understanding perhaps. A question posed and answered silently without judgement.
"There are a lot of ethics here to consider, Jana" Chelsea turned to the Chief of Science with a very serious look on her face but not an unkind one.
"Not to mention a whole semester of Medical points to raise and explain." It was Jana's turn to fall under the scrutiny of the Chief Medical Officer's searching gaze.
"What am I supposed to do Chelsea? This is what Melanie wanted if something happened to her and it did..." She met her friend's gaze. Jana knew that she had her back up about the issue..."Please Chelsea...tell me what to do."
"I cannot do that, Jana. You know I can't. Only you and you alone can decide to initiate a life and take on all the responsibilities that will snowball out of that one gesture of loyalty and kindness to your friend. You know what you owe her, but DO you know what you owe her child. It is totally different, you know" Chelsea was playing Devil's Advocate here, it was her job to make sure Jana first, and then later Ben, had considered every possible angle. She was not allowed, under any circumstances whatsoever, to allow her own feelings to come into this, nor even to be seen or guessed at.
Jana looked down at her hands that gripped her cup of tea and nodded. "I owe the child a chance to be loved, to know who their parents were and how much they loved him or her, to know a life that should be lived to the fullest. I will love the child as if it were of my own blood. Please Chelsea test me to make sure that I can do this? I promise to give it a month to seriously think about this before I let my emotions make the decision for me."
"That sounds sensible" Chelsea commented. "On that basis, with a month to go into all the ins and outs, then I agree that at the end of that time, providing we have covered all the ethics with the Counsellor and all the legalities with JAG as well as some medical details too."
~JAG? Counsellor and Ethics?~ She thought to herself and looked at Ben for reassurance. Jana knew that this would be difficult but not to this extent. "Let's just get the testing done shall we? I enjoy your company Chelsea but I am sure you have more important things to do and I really don't want to keep you."
Chelsea knew an exit line when she heard one. She shrugged and smiled and patted a bio-bed indicating that Jana should climb aboard. Once she was lying down, the med arch was activated and the tests began. Chelsea just had to program in a few prompts and a whole screen of readouts began to scroll through. Suddenly Chelsea's soft Bajoran ridges creased together in surprise.
"Um... okay, this is going to throw a spanner in the works." she said, pressing buttons that lifted the arch stopping the whole procedure mid-run. "I have good news and bad news, I'm afraid. Which one do you want first?"
Jana sat up, afraid she grabbed Ben's hand and sat up. Good news and bad news...she didn't like the sound of that...what could it possibly be? "I'm guessing the bad...is...I can't carry Melanie's baby..." Jana looked up at Chelsea and resigned herself to the news, tears swam in her eyes, she would not be able to fulfill her best friend's last wish. "What is the good news then?" She asked.
"The reason why..... that's the good news. Well, I hope it is. You can't carry the foetus because you are already carrying one of your own. Jana you're pregnant." Chelsea spoke the stunning words softly, placing her hand over Jana's gently.
Ben stood stock still, the blood draining from his face as he sat down hard, almost missing the chair.
"I'm what?" She asked. "How far along?" She tried counting back to her last cycle but her mind was spinning. Jana groaned and fell back against the bed, covering her face with her hands. "Chelsea...I need you to run a DNA scan." She said through her hands, she was completely embarrassed having to say that. It could possibly be Thomas' child, she prayed it was Ben's but there was still the chance. "I'm sorry Ben." She whispered.
Chelsea looked at Ben who was clearly bewildered. "Of course" she replied gently, pushing the appropriate *buttons* to run blood tests. "I think we're looking at very early indeed. Perhaps only a couple of weeks, maybe less."
As Chelsea mentioned a 'couple' of weeks, Ben's face seemed to take on a glimmer of something like understanding, like a light bulb coming on. In her own head, even Chelsea was doing the math. Ben had arrived on Stardate 22 - fourteen days ago but even 'he' couldn't surely be 'that' much of a fast worker.
This embryo was so under-developed it was almost off the bottom end of the scale of detectable, in former centuries, medicine would have been too primitive to even recognise the fact that an egg had been fertilised and embedded. It was micro-science at this stage.
Chelsea thought about asking who else's DNA she should run as it would save time to know who she was looking to eliminate but then again, she decided this was delicate enough as it was. She made a start with Ben's. If it wasn't his, then they could ask more questions, but only if it were absolutely necessary.
The blood scan came up without a result. The only DNA in Jana's blood was her own.
"Jana, I'm sorry. It's too early to tell. I'm going to have to wait until the embryo gets large enough and secure enough for a direct test." She realised how difficult this was going to be but she couldn't risk a direct interference with a newly forming life whilst it was barely more than a few rapidly multiplying cells.
"If I try to test such a newly formed, barely embedded foetus itself - especially at such a critical stage, it could become dislodged before the connection it is currently making becomes secure enough." She explained carefully to the shocked couple. She could see the misery this was causing them both but her hands were tied by the frailty of the tiny life, barely more than a few cells, struggling to grow into a sentient being.
"Basically, it could cause a miscarriage if I test the foetus itself. I've tried blood from your own body Jana and we can do that again in a couple of weeks, perhaps even coming from arteries from behind the womb-wall next time, but again, we HAVE to be agonisingly careful not to upset the delicate balance so early on. This is too delicate and the odds are too high that something could go wrong."
Chelsea spoke quietly and gently, these were both medically and scientifically trained experts, they knew all that she was saying before she was even spelling it out but in a situation that was so emotive, shock often made even the most intelligent brains reach desperately for things they wouldn't normally even consider.
"I *know* you wouldn't ask me, and you know I could never agree anyway, to risk harm to the child no matter what." It was a rhetorical statement, not even a question. They didn't need to answer. None of the three of them would ever dream of taking the risk.
"We have to be patient, there's no reason to jump to conclusions." She said specifically to Ben as she passed him, placing her hand on his shoulder as a friend who cares, making eye contact just before she left the two of them alone for a private moment.
Ben looked up, his eyes still seemed glazed but there was a glimmer of recognition of the reassurance she was offering. He knew he could count on her, whatever happened. They had been friends long enough over the past two postings and they had been through enough as colleagues as well, to have become close. He took encouragement from her hand on his shoulder. She was telling him this was going to be something he could get through.
~She's right~ he thought to himself, tearing his eyes from those of his good friend and looking over at the woman he hadn't looked at for a full five minutes since his world had soared to heights of joy and then crashed to depths of misery in what had seemed like two heartbeats.
Jana wasn't looking at him, she seemed to be avoiding his gaze at first but then she looked up and Ben felt all the universe spin. Her lovely face was torn with emotion and her hair fell around it, framing it with waves of wild darkness. He reached out instinctively, drawn to touch it by some force he could have done nothing to resist and smoothed the most wayward strands back from her exquisite ivory skin, his fingers brushing her cheek as he hooked the curl behind her delicate ear.
Her cheek was wet to his touch and as he leaned towards her, their eyes met.
Jana burst into tears the moment their eyes locked. She flinched as she waited for the verbal onslaught to begin, waiting to be called every name in the book but he simply looked at her, compassion in his eyes. "I'm so sorry Ben..." She wrapped her arms around him and held him close to her when the yelling didn't start. She was distraught by the pain that she had caused him. How could she ever make it up to him? Would this be how they parted? Jana was confused by his reaction, why wasn't he yelling and screaming at her and calling her a whore? She had obviously slept with two men close enough together that she even thought that of herself. Was he waiting until they were back in her quarters or his before he let loose on her?
A million thoughts ran through her mind as he held her and stroked her hair. He held her until she had no more tears to shed. "Ben...I promise, I didn't cheat on you." She whispered against his neck. "I had been alone for so long after Damon's death and I needed to feel real...it was before you and I had even met..."
"Jana........ " his voice was soft as he pulled gently back and looked at her pale face, her eyes, red with tears but still the most amazing eyes in the universe, deep, full of everything he ever wanted. "I have only one thing to say and then we'll never discuss it again, ok?"
~Oh great! Here it comes!~ She thought to herself, Jana was about to lose the one person in her life that meant anything to her. Fresh tears brimmed her eyes and she looked away from him until he began to speak.
He got out a hanky, struggling a little as he didn't want to let her go. He let her get herself calm as he dried her tear stained cheeks. "I know it isn't my call, but I don't want you to have a DNA test." She looked shocked but before she could reply he held up his finger and put it against her lips in a shh gesture.
"Jana, I love you, this is *our* child and I don't care about whoever *he* was, you're with me now and he's lost you, that's his tough luck. I don't need to know who he is, i just want you to be able to look me in the eyes and say you can forget him and love me now." She seemed to be bursting to reply but he kept his finger on her lips as he avoided her eyes for a few more seconds. He began to struggle to reach into his pockets again, the same as he had when he was fetching the hanky out.
"I was saving this for later but I want to marry you Jana." he pulled out a box with an engagement ring inside. "Will you do me the honour of making me the happiest man in the universe by becoming my wife?" having got this out, his hand shaking, he finally looked into her eyes.
".... and please can we forget the DNA test on *our* baby?" he added hurriedly, his cheeks a little pink from sneaking that in such an underhand way.
Jana looked at him in shock, she was still trying to process everything that he said when he took out the ring. She stared at the ring, ~what just happened?~ She asked herself, there was a step missing and she was confused. Damon would of thrown her out on her ass had she told him that there was the possibility he wasn't the father of the child she was carrying and here Ben was proposing to her. Had she stepped into an alternate reality? She hadn't had luck with men...even when she was engaged and was supposed to marry them...but Damon had died and Ben wasn't Damon...
She looked at him, really looked at him and saw that Ben was completely serious. Jana saw nothing but love in his eyes, he looked at her differently than Damon ever did. ~STOP IT!~ She scolded herself. Ben was not Damon...he would never turn into Damon and she had to stop comparing the two of them.
"Yes, Ben....I will marry you." She wrapped her arms around him and pulled him close to her. "I promise to love you and forget about the rest." She whispered in his ears. "I love you."
That was all Ben needed to hear. He hugged her so tightly against him that after a few moments he had to check if she was still breathing. He grinned at her like a Cheshire cat. " Mr and Mrs Benjamen Kensington... and their baby, George!" he teased. "How does that sound, Mrs K?"
"Not George! Please not George!" She laughed. "Besides, what if our baby is a girl? We can't exactly be calling her George." Jana looked at the ring and then back up at him. "Mr. Kensington...do I have to put the ring on myself? I thought traditionally the male of the species did that..."
"Yes we can... we can call her Georgia.... what's wrong with George?" Ben pretended to be serious about the name as he took the hint and removed the ring from the box. It was a Czech sapphire set within a ring of diamonds, exactly as she had described her mother's but with a blue gem rather than the red one her mother had. He hoped she would like it. It was a bit of a risk going so close to one that already held a significant sentimental meaning but she had described the other one with such admiration. He slipped it on her delicate finger, as she held up her left hand. Kissing her with a gentle sincerity, he whispered. "It's okay, we can call her Henri... if you don't like George" Grinning he ducked an incoming whack and gently caught her hand.
"How about Dragana if it a girl?" She said laughing again. Jana pulled her hand back and looked at the ring. "It's just like mami's." Jana smiled and realised that he was in fact listening when she spoke of her mother's ring. "I love the ring Ben! It reminds me of home."
Ben grinned happily. ~Result!~ he congratulated himself silently.
"Can we tell Chelsea?" he asked Jana, looking towards the door that the CMO had gone out through.
"Of course." Jana smiled warmly and hopped off the bed, she took his hand and went back into Chelsea's office. "Chelsea?...we have decided not to do the DNA test...and..." She raised her left hand to show her friend the most exciting news.
Chelsea looked at the ring and smiled broadly. "That's the best news!" she exclaimed and came round the desk to hug them both.
"Congratulations! This calls for a celebratory coffee.... sorry, i'm on duty, but we can get something stronger later.... well, Ben and I can... you're off alcohol for 9 mths, missy!" she grinned.
"I will have decaf then." Jana smiled. "I promise, no alcohol. How about the four of go out tonight and have some dinner? "
"That's a great idea!!" Ben was full on. "Awesome.... What do you think Che... boss? Come ON.. we have so much to celebrate.... what about a joint wedding?? I can't wait.... what time tonight.... 7.30? Shall we go to the box?"
"Woooah!!!!!!" Chelsea had to put her hands on his shoulders to slow him down.
"NO.... nothing personal, but as much as i adore you both, a double wedding is out of the question. I want to be matron of honour at yours... not someone who has an agenda of her own. If that's okay? But dinner.. okay... i'll speak to Rick and see what his shifts are like." she grinned.
"Only if I am yours." Jana smiled back. "Ben, my love....I don't want a double wedding either. Double dates fine...but I want our own ceremony...I have a lot of planning to do! "
Chelsea gave a sigh of relief and Ben shrugged. "Okay, no worries." He agreed without any fuss. It didn't matter to him if the girls didn't want it.
"About that, Jana.. I said I'd like to be your matron of honour and of course I'd be honoured if you wanted that, but I have to confess I've already asked Isha to be mine. I'm very sorry. I'd understand totally if you had a difference choice too." Chelsea explained.
Jana waved off Chelsea. "I know you have been planning yours a lot longer. Of course you can be my Matron of Honour. You are the one that got us together afterall, I wouldn't have it any other way." She smiled and hugged Chelsea. "Thank you Chelsea...for everything." She smiled, her eyes wet once again with tears but this time with happy tears.
OFF:
A JP between:
Lt. Jana Kasikova
CSO - DS5
and
Lt Ben Kensington
ACMO - DS5
(NPC by jools)