Incommunicado – I Wanna Hold Your Hand
by Commander Rakka & Lieutenant JG Petro
Post Details
Rakka knew she could go through other channels to get set up with her own quarters if she were determined enough, but she didn't want to leave Petro's yet, despite the fact that, so far, Petro had not shown up while she was there. She spent more time here than she normally would in her quarters, hoping for her friend to show up so that they could catch up properly.
Finally, while she paced alone, sipping hot chocolate, the door slid open and the Nausicaan nearly spilled her oversized mug.
"Petro!"
The J'Naii walked through the doors and set a PaDD on the first flat object she could find. She smiled at Rakka, the kind of smile that says 'I'm so glad you're in my life, please never go away.' and sat on the couch. "I know my quarters aren't as large as you're used to, but I hope you've been able to make yourself at home."
"Yes--yes!" Rakka assured her, joining her friend on the couch and setting her mug on the coffee table. "I have no use for large spaces. It is perfectly comfortable here." She paused and wrung her hands for a few moments. "Petro. There are... so many things I would like to know... but I suppose you have come to get some sleep."
Petro sat up and turned to face Rakka. "I don't think I could sleep a wink. I haven't seen you in forever and when you finally get back we can't spend any time together. Sleep be damned," she said then yawned, "for the time being anyway." She added with a smile.
"Good...!" Rakka sighed, feeling a little nervous now. "So.... uhhmmm... tell me what's been happening with you...?"
"The Doctor released me to return to duty and of course there was a ton of things to get finished. It seems that the renovations we did back when we were dealing the Boaerans had been completely ignored. The Engineering department, try as they may, have been unable to keep up with the glitches and issues around the station. Of course, everything is a priority to everyone and theirs is the most important even if it menial in the grand scheme of things." Petro explained. "Then I had to find accommodations for the Klingons whose domiciles were being repaired and they were difficult to please. This is too soft, that's too hard, and so on. Of course I'm still trying to figure out the communication issue, which is starting to affect inner station comms as well. I kind of feel like I'm being run down, pumped back up and pushed on to the next project."
"What about you?" she asked, rising to retrieve a relaxing cup of K'Tarian hot chocolate before returning to the couch to sit by Rakka.
"Oh... not nearly as busy as you," Rakka said, realizing she was going to have to be more direct if she wanted to get to what she really wanted to know. "Things are still quite... disorganized... in Security. Lots of shuffling of staff. Other than that... well... clearly you have had more interesting... adventures... than I have over the last few months." Not wanting to look down on Petro anymore, she slipped down onto the floor, leaning against the couch cushion and looking up at her instead. "How about these... changes? Would you tell me about them?"
Petro took a sip of her drink and looked down at Rakka. "Well, part of the changes had to do with the officer training. That was a lot of studying, which I'm sure you remember, and then I got to venture out on my own for a little while. Meeting new people, dealing with near death disasters on a little shuttlecraft that had been modified for long trips. But I knew I would be coming home eventually and I thought I would take up the Quartermaster Position again if it was available. It was, but the Captain had other plans and all but dared me to take on communications. So, now I do both." She took another sip of her drink and smiled. "What about your changes? After dealing with your father I'm sure you've had some adventures."
Rakka took a deep breath. Even more directness was clearly required. "No adventures," she said. "I just... came straight here to find you. Please... I want to know why you changed your... appearance."
Petro was a little taken aback by the question. She really hadn't thought about it in a while. "You..don't...like..it?" she asked, deathly afraid that Rakka would reject her. She stood from the couch and set her drink on the table. "it just made me uglier, didn't it? I knew I should have taken things a little slower but...I guess you'll leave me now because of this. I understand. Someone as beautiful as you being with someone as unbecoming as me." Tears started falling down her cheeks. She ignored them, turning her face away from Rakka. "I don't know what I was thinking. I hoped you would enjoy it."
Shocked, Rakka sputtered for a moment. "Wh... I... no! I mean, yes... no, but... Petro! I would never... never, ever leave you... no matter what you looked like!" She reached out as if to comfort her friend, but since neither of them was accustomed to touching, she just let her hand hover. "There is NOTHING beautiful about me... you were always the beautiful one. I told you, I told you before and always... you were beautiful. So I don't know why you felt you had to... change yourself. Did I ever say anything... that made you feel tha way? Did someone else make you feel like you weren't enough... female? Was it that Monteros woman who hovers around you like a schoolgirl?! By gods, if she ever told you to make yourself more female, she and I will have some words....!"
"Everything about you is beautiful." Petro said, turning around. "You have a kind heart, a strong mind. You have breasts and a woman's shape. Me, people can't tell if I was a male or a female. I guess I got tired of being referred to as 'that boy' or watching people steer away from me on celebrated holidays. Once I was under the missal-toe and people would just stare at me like I did something wrong. I figured that if they felt that way then maybe...you know...you at least has Sosha but no one was attracted to me. I guess I'm kind of stupid for thinking that changing the way I look would make any kind of difference." She sat back down on the couch and held her face in her hands, barely able to speak. "People..don't know...what to... make of me."
Rakka took a deep breath, unsure how to react to her friend's emotions. "You think because... I have these...." she said slowly, lightly cupping her heavy breasts, "that life is any easier for me...? Quite honestly they just get in my way. Socha was only attracted to me because I'm... grotesque. She liked to chase.... strange-looking aliens. That was her thing. After she dumped me I'd never felt worse." She swallowed hard and looked down at the floor. "Is that what you want... for people to be attracted to you? Do you want to be... kissed? Because I'm sure you'll get what you want. Men stare at you now. Maybe you don't notice... but it's not going to be very long before you're just as popular as you'd ever want to be."
Petro started to feel ashamed that she had undergone the physical changes. "I..I don't know what I want." she said. "I want to be with you. I don't know about being popular. I don't know about kissing. Maybe I was just ashamed of being nothing." She lowered her head and cried. "Now I'm nothing in a body that isn't really mine."
Rakka felt terrible now that she had even brought it up--how could she make her friend feel bad over a decision that she knew must have been a difficult one to make? "I'm sorry!" she breathed, unable to tolerate poor Petro crying on her account. She gave up her touch-phobia for the moment and knelt before Petro, taking both of her tiny hands in hers. "Please don't say that. You are the most important person in the world to me. In fact... you might as well be the only person in the world. And your body... it's lovely. It was lovely before, and it still is--I just have to become... accustomed to it. There's nothing wrong with it at all. Please don't be sad anymore--not over my foolishness. On the bright side now... you will be able to... fit women's clothes better! I would go shopping with you... if you wanted. The whole world will wonder what I'm doing with such a beautiful woman as you....."
Petro looked up at Rakka, noticing that they were holding hands. "I'd like that. I really would," she said, "and if they would ask why I'm with you I'll ask them why they weren't."
It was one of those rare times when Rakka thought she would have smiled... if she could. Perhaps that was something a doctor could fix? "You are the nicest person," she said. "If anyone ignores you they are very foolish. So how do you feel about... holding hands?"
Petro looked at her then at their hands. "Well, we're holding them now."
"Well, yes... and how does it make you feel...?" Rakka pressed, looking up at her expectantly and ready to let go at a moment's notice.
"Actually," Petro said, looking into Rakka's eyes, "if feels natural. How does it make you feel."
"It's sort of... nice," Rakka replied, cocking her head in a thoughtful way. "Yes, natural--that is how it feels. And... safe."
They stayed that way for what seemed like forever and like no time at all. "So," Petro began, "what do we do now?"
"Um... uh..." Rakka mumbled. "Should we... get something to eat?"
The mention of food reminded her of how hungry she was. She hadn't eaten anything all day. "I think that would be a good idea. Just give me a few minutes to shower and change before we go. I probably smell like a targ."
"A targ? Oh... no, you don't!" Rakka assured her. "Actually, that is so... untrue... that I think it is... amusing!"
Petro laughed. "I still need a shower anyway." She stood and made her way to the bedroom, removed her uniform and stepped into the shower. "What were you thinking for dinner?" she asked while washing her hair.
Rakka froze up, unable to speak for several long moments as she could not avoid the thought that Petro was talking to her while naked. "I................. dunno!" she finally managed.
Petro finished her shower and wrapped a towel around her petite frame. When she stepped into the main room she noticed the Rakka looked uncomfortable. She turned around and decided to get dressed before resuming a conversation with her. Moments later she emerged wearing a plain pair of pants and a loose t-shirt.
"Perhaps we could go to your favorite place, oh, what was the name of it - the one where the chef seemed to like you."
Rakka swallowed hard. "y'Inchu?" she whispered. "Ehhhmm... I don't think he... likes me so much... anymore. Besides... I don't think you're as fond of Klingon food as I am. Please, choose your favorite--I will eat anywhere that serves meat. And chocolate."
"I'm not sure what I want." Petro confessed. "Maybe we should just go up there and see where our senses take us."
Rakka nodded and stood. "That sounds... nice."
---------------------------------
Cdr. Rakka
Security Consultant/Trainer
DS5
&
Lieutenant JG Petro
Communications Officer
by Commander Rakka & Lieutenant JG Petro
Post Details
| Title | I Wanna Hold Your Hand | |
| Mission | Incommunicado | |
| Author(s) | Commander Rakka & Lieutenant JG Petro | |
| Posted | Thu Jul 12, 2012 @ 11:47pm | |
| Location | Petro's Quarters | |
| Timeline | SD58, noonish |
Finally, while she paced alone, sipping hot chocolate, the door slid open and the Nausicaan nearly spilled her oversized mug.
"Petro!"
The J'Naii walked through the doors and set a PaDD on the first flat object she could find. She smiled at Rakka, the kind of smile that says 'I'm so glad you're in my life, please never go away.' and sat on the couch. "I know my quarters aren't as large as you're used to, but I hope you've been able to make yourself at home."
"Yes--yes!" Rakka assured her, joining her friend on the couch and setting her mug on the coffee table. "I have no use for large spaces. It is perfectly comfortable here." She paused and wrung her hands for a few moments. "Petro. There are... so many things I would like to know... but I suppose you have come to get some sleep."
Petro sat up and turned to face Rakka. "I don't think I could sleep a wink. I haven't seen you in forever and when you finally get back we can't spend any time together. Sleep be damned," she said then yawned, "for the time being anyway." She added with a smile.
"Good...!" Rakka sighed, feeling a little nervous now. "So.... uhhmmm... tell me what's been happening with you...?"
"The Doctor released me to return to duty and of course there was a ton of things to get finished. It seems that the renovations we did back when we were dealing the Boaerans had been completely ignored. The Engineering department, try as they may, have been unable to keep up with the glitches and issues around the station. Of course, everything is a priority to everyone and theirs is the most important even if it menial in the grand scheme of things." Petro explained. "Then I had to find accommodations for the Klingons whose domiciles were being repaired and they were difficult to please. This is too soft, that's too hard, and so on. Of course I'm still trying to figure out the communication issue, which is starting to affect inner station comms as well. I kind of feel like I'm being run down, pumped back up and pushed on to the next project."
"What about you?" she asked, rising to retrieve a relaxing cup of K'Tarian hot chocolate before returning to the couch to sit by Rakka.
"Oh... not nearly as busy as you," Rakka said, realizing she was going to have to be more direct if she wanted to get to what she really wanted to know. "Things are still quite... disorganized... in Security. Lots of shuffling of staff. Other than that... well... clearly you have had more interesting... adventures... than I have over the last few months." Not wanting to look down on Petro anymore, she slipped down onto the floor, leaning against the couch cushion and looking up at her instead. "How about these... changes? Would you tell me about them?"
Petro took a sip of her drink and looked down at Rakka. "Well, part of the changes had to do with the officer training. That was a lot of studying, which I'm sure you remember, and then I got to venture out on my own for a little while. Meeting new people, dealing with near death disasters on a little shuttlecraft that had been modified for long trips. But I knew I would be coming home eventually and I thought I would take up the Quartermaster Position again if it was available. It was, but the Captain had other plans and all but dared me to take on communications. So, now I do both." She took another sip of her drink and smiled. "What about your changes? After dealing with your father I'm sure you've had some adventures."
Rakka took a deep breath. Even more directness was clearly required. "No adventures," she said. "I just... came straight here to find you. Please... I want to know why you changed your... appearance."
Petro was a little taken aback by the question. She really hadn't thought about it in a while. "You..don't...like..it?" she asked, deathly afraid that Rakka would reject her. She stood from the couch and set her drink on the table. "it just made me uglier, didn't it? I knew I should have taken things a little slower but...I guess you'll leave me now because of this. I understand. Someone as beautiful as you being with someone as unbecoming as me." Tears started falling down her cheeks. She ignored them, turning her face away from Rakka. "I don't know what I was thinking. I hoped you would enjoy it."
Shocked, Rakka sputtered for a moment. "Wh... I... no! I mean, yes... no, but... Petro! I would never... never, ever leave you... no matter what you looked like!" She reached out as if to comfort her friend, but since neither of them was accustomed to touching, she just let her hand hover. "There is NOTHING beautiful about me... you were always the beautiful one. I told you, I told you before and always... you were beautiful. So I don't know why you felt you had to... change yourself. Did I ever say anything... that made you feel tha way? Did someone else make you feel like you weren't enough... female? Was it that Monteros woman who hovers around you like a schoolgirl?! By gods, if she ever told you to make yourself more female, she and I will have some words....!"
"Everything about you is beautiful." Petro said, turning around. "You have a kind heart, a strong mind. You have breasts and a woman's shape. Me, people can't tell if I was a male or a female. I guess I got tired of being referred to as 'that boy' or watching people steer away from me on celebrated holidays. Once I was under the missal-toe and people would just stare at me like I did something wrong. I figured that if they felt that way then maybe...you know...you at least has Sosha but no one was attracted to me. I guess I'm kind of stupid for thinking that changing the way I look would make any kind of difference." She sat back down on the couch and held her face in her hands, barely able to speak. "People..don't know...what to... make of me."
Rakka took a deep breath, unsure how to react to her friend's emotions. "You think because... I have these...." she said slowly, lightly cupping her heavy breasts, "that life is any easier for me...? Quite honestly they just get in my way. Socha was only attracted to me because I'm... grotesque. She liked to chase.... strange-looking aliens. That was her thing. After she dumped me I'd never felt worse." She swallowed hard and looked down at the floor. "Is that what you want... for people to be attracted to you? Do you want to be... kissed? Because I'm sure you'll get what you want. Men stare at you now. Maybe you don't notice... but it's not going to be very long before you're just as popular as you'd ever want to be."
Petro started to feel ashamed that she had undergone the physical changes. "I..I don't know what I want." she said. "I want to be with you. I don't know about being popular. I don't know about kissing. Maybe I was just ashamed of being nothing." She lowered her head and cried. "Now I'm nothing in a body that isn't really mine."
Rakka felt terrible now that she had even brought it up--how could she make her friend feel bad over a decision that she knew must have been a difficult one to make? "I'm sorry!" she breathed, unable to tolerate poor Petro crying on her account. She gave up her touch-phobia for the moment and knelt before Petro, taking both of her tiny hands in hers. "Please don't say that. You are the most important person in the world to me. In fact... you might as well be the only person in the world. And your body... it's lovely. It was lovely before, and it still is--I just have to become... accustomed to it. There's nothing wrong with it at all. Please don't be sad anymore--not over my foolishness. On the bright side now... you will be able to... fit women's clothes better! I would go shopping with you... if you wanted. The whole world will wonder what I'm doing with such a beautiful woman as you....."
Petro looked up at Rakka, noticing that they were holding hands. "I'd like that. I really would," she said, "and if they would ask why I'm with you I'll ask them why they weren't."
It was one of those rare times when Rakka thought she would have smiled... if she could. Perhaps that was something a doctor could fix? "You are the nicest person," she said. "If anyone ignores you they are very foolish. So how do you feel about... holding hands?"
Petro looked at her then at their hands. "Well, we're holding them now."
"Well, yes... and how does it make you feel...?" Rakka pressed, looking up at her expectantly and ready to let go at a moment's notice.
"Actually," Petro said, looking into Rakka's eyes, "if feels natural. How does it make you feel."
"It's sort of... nice," Rakka replied, cocking her head in a thoughtful way. "Yes, natural--that is how it feels. And... safe."
They stayed that way for what seemed like forever and like no time at all. "So," Petro began, "what do we do now?"
"Um... uh..." Rakka mumbled. "Should we... get something to eat?"
The mention of food reminded her of how hungry she was. She hadn't eaten anything all day. "I think that would be a good idea. Just give me a few minutes to shower and change before we go. I probably smell like a targ."
"A targ? Oh... no, you don't!" Rakka assured her. "Actually, that is so... untrue... that I think it is... amusing!"
Petro laughed. "I still need a shower anyway." She stood and made her way to the bedroom, removed her uniform and stepped into the shower. "What were you thinking for dinner?" she asked while washing her hair.
Rakka froze up, unable to speak for several long moments as she could not avoid the thought that Petro was talking to her while naked. "I................. dunno!" she finally managed.
Petro finished her shower and wrapped a towel around her petite frame. When she stepped into the main room she noticed the Rakka looked uncomfortable. She turned around and decided to get dressed before resuming a conversation with her. Moments later she emerged wearing a plain pair of pants and a loose t-shirt.
"Perhaps we could go to your favorite place, oh, what was the name of it - the one where the chef seemed to like you."
Rakka swallowed hard. "y'Inchu?" she whispered. "Ehhhmm... I don't think he... likes me so much... anymore. Besides... I don't think you're as fond of Klingon food as I am. Please, choose your favorite--I will eat anywhere that serves meat. And chocolate."
"I'm not sure what I want." Petro confessed. "Maybe we should just go up there and see where our senses take us."
Rakka nodded and stood. "That sounds... nice."
---------------------------------
Cdr. Rakka
Security Consultant/Trainer
DS5
&
Lieutenant JG Petro
Communications Officer