Judgement – I can do this, I have to
by Lieutenant Jana Kasikova & Commander Chelsea Dunham
Post Details
Jana woke with a start, she gasped and fell off the couch with a thud. "Ow." She groaned. She looked around the dark quarters not recognising her surroundings. The memories came flooding back, her best friend was gone and she was in her boyfriend's quarters. Tears welled up in her eyes, she quickly blinked them away. Her eyes and cheeks were still raw from the crying the night before.
Jana saw him sleeping in the chair next to the couch. She quietly picked herself off the floor and took the blanket that had covered her to cover him. She smiled down at him as she watched him sleep. Jana leaned down and kissed his forehead and silently thanked him for being there for her the night before.
She slowly began to navigate her way out of Ben's quarters...Jana had a lot to think about.
Ben nestled into the cover without waking, he turned over and stayed fast asleep. When he awoke a few hours later, he realised Jana was gone. Getting straight up and cursing himself for sleeping so deeply, Ben threw off the cover and went into the bathroom. He showered quickly, tidied himself up and went immediately off in search of her without paying any attention to the protests of his empty stomach.
When he got to her quarters, Ben rang the chime to see if Jana was in.
Jana had returned from riding on the holodeck and spending time in her lab about 20 minutes before she heard the chime ring. Riding was the only thing that let her think without distraction.
She opened the door and gave Ben a sad smile. "Hi Ben." She hugged him, reluctantly letting him go after a couple moments. "I figured I would let you sleep. I went to riding first and then made my way to the lab to research the possibility of carrying Melanie's baby."
Ben kept his feelings hidden carefully as he had done all along. He would never let his own feelings influence what Jana had to decide.
"What did you find out?" he asked, just content to hold her close at first and then dropping onto the sofa when she let him go.
"I found some promising evidence. Betazoid and Human physiology is very similar. I have found a couple of studies where human women carried Betazoid and Betazoid hybrid embryos." Jana handed Ben the PADD with the data she had collected.
Ben's stomach rumbled, reminding him that he hadn't stopped for breakfast because he'd been so intent on finding her in case she was somewhere all upset.
He took a look at the medical evidence. "Naturally I'm concerned that there should be no possible danger to the host." he said as he was reading.
Jana replicated them both some breakfast, she heard Ben's stomach rumble and realised that she hadn't eaten anything in hours. She replicated fruit, slices of a bagette with jam and butter. She put on the coffee table and replicated juice and coffee.
Jana joined him on the couch and took a strawberry but didn't eat it. "Is that your only concern Ben? I know you are holding back but I don't understand why." Jana looked up at him. "Tell me...please." She reached out and took his hand.
"Of course it's the main concern, sweetheart. In *any* case where someone voluntarily takes on a potentially life-threatening position for the sake of another - the first consideration *must* be *how* threatened their life might become." he replied, taking a helping of bread and spreading it. "Thank you for breakfast, I was *starving*" he added, offering her some of the prepared fare on the table.
"Thank you. But how do *you* feel about this? About us?" She asked quietly. "I need to know. I care for you deeply, even in this short time. You have brought something to me that hasn't been here in a really really long time."
"I care for you too, Jana" Ben replied honestly. "but I don't have a right to influence what you decide. This is too personal. I didn't know Melanie or her fiancé and I hardly know you to be honest. What i feel is irrelevant and you shouldn't be asking because if I end up changing what you decide that would be wrong, so I *cannot* give you any indication that I'm leaning one way or the other. I can only give you a medical opinion."
Jana put her head on his shoulder. "It matters to me what you think about this Ben. It is personal but I want to be with you and so this effects you too if we are to be together. Can I have your personal opinion before your medical one? Please?"
"Are you asking me to help you raise this child?" he asked bluntly. "When you say you want us to be together, is that what you're asking me to comment on?" He wasn't entirely clear and he would have to be, before he could possibly start talking about the future for the two of them, with or without a child.
Jana sat very still for a few moments, processing her thoughts before she spoke. "I suppose I am Ben. But I dont want to lose you in the process. I want to be with you..adding the child to what we have is...it will complaticate things between us, I know that. What I feel for you is so different than I have ever felt for any other man...even...Damon. Perhaps it was because I was younger and more naive of how the world works, I don't know. Even in the short time we have been together I can't imagine you not in my life."
Ben was moved. He took her face between both of his hands and looked deep into her eyes, his face serious. "Jana" he breathed, his lips close to hers. "I want to be with you too, and I realise that means with this child as well. You don't come as a single item any more and i want you, so ..... I think we have no option but to give it our very best shot".
Her arms reached to his face, caressing his cheek as she gazed into his eyes."I don't know what I would do without you." She smiled and kissed him.
Ben looked back into her eyes and felt himself drown. "Jana..... " he began, swallowing hard, taking in air while he still could. "We hardly know each other.... if this doesn't work, there will be a child..... it's a lot to manage all at once." She was so beautiful he couldn't say no to her but his sub-conscious knew this was an act of madness so soon in their relationship.
"What if...... " was all he managed to plead before her lips met his and he was lost for all time.
"What if what?" She finally managed to say breaking the kiss but her lips hovered so close to his.
"Nothing..... " he murmoured, all his senses focussed on those lips, he was mesmerised. He leaned forward like a man who was magnetised and losing his balance against the force that drew him closer, his lips hungry for more.
"Do..you want to move this to...." She couldn't finish the words as he took more from her.
Ben reached down with his right arm and swept her legs from under her, taking the weight of her top half as she was tipped back into his waiting left arm. With her head cradled against his shoulder, her feet in the air and her arms clinging to his neck as the momentum, he lifted her high.
He thought of the time they had first kissed, when he had spun her in the holodeck. There was no room for that in these quarters but he was able to carry her into the bedroom, grinning at the way she gasped and laughed as she was thrown softly around in his arms.
He put her gently back on her feet as they reached the bedroom and bent to kiss her again, fully expecting to be chastised for having been so forward as to sweep her off her feet without warning or without allowing her to finish what she had been about to say. He adored teasing her and having her pretend to be cross with him for it. It was a game they had begun to make a habit of playing, much to his delight as it almost always ended up with a reconciliation and making up was SO much fun.
OFF:
A JP Between:
Lt Ben Kensington
ACMO - DS5 (pNPC)
and
Lt. Jana Kasikova
CSO - DS5
by Lieutenant Jana Kasikova & Commander Chelsea Dunham
Post Details
| Title | I can do this, I have to | |
| Mission | Judgement | |
| Author(s) | Lieutenant Jana Kasikova & Commander Chelsea Dunham | |
| Posted | Tue Nov 02, 2010 @ 6:53pm | |
| Location | Jana's Quarters | |
| Timeline | SD35 - 06.00 |
Jana saw him sleeping in the chair next to the couch. She quietly picked herself off the floor and took the blanket that had covered her to cover him. She smiled down at him as she watched him sleep. Jana leaned down and kissed his forehead and silently thanked him for being there for her the night before.
She slowly began to navigate her way out of Ben's quarters...Jana had a lot to think about.
Ben nestled into the cover without waking, he turned over and stayed fast asleep. When he awoke a few hours later, he realised Jana was gone. Getting straight up and cursing himself for sleeping so deeply, Ben threw off the cover and went into the bathroom. He showered quickly, tidied himself up and went immediately off in search of her without paying any attention to the protests of his empty stomach.
When he got to her quarters, Ben rang the chime to see if Jana was in.
Jana had returned from riding on the holodeck and spending time in her lab about 20 minutes before she heard the chime ring. Riding was the only thing that let her think without distraction.
She opened the door and gave Ben a sad smile. "Hi Ben." She hugged him, reluctantly letting him go after a couple moments. "I figured I would let you sleep. I went to riding first and then made my way to the lab to research the possibility of carrying Melanie's baby."
Ben kept his feelings hidden carefully as he had done all along. He would never let his own feelings influence what Jana had to decide.
"What did you find out?" he asked, just content to hold her close at first and then dropping onto the sofa when she let him go.
"I found some promising evidence. Betazoid and Human physiology is very similar. I have found a couple of studies where human women carried Betazoid and Betazoid hybrid embryos." Jana handed Ben the PADD with the data she had collected.
Ben's stomach rumbled, reminding him that he hadn't stopped for breakfast because he'd been so intent on finding her in case she was somewhere all upset.
He took a look at the medical evidence. "Naturally I'm concerned that there should be no possible danger to the host." he said as he was reading.
Jana replicated them both some breakfast, she heard Ben's stomach rumble and realised that she hadn't eaten anything in hours. She replicated fruit, slices of a bagette with jam and butter. She put on the coffee table and replicated juice and coffee.
Jana joined him on the couch and took a strawberry but didn't eat it. "Is that your only concern Ben? I know you are holding back but I don't understand why." Jana looked up at him. "Tell me...please." She reached out and took his hand.
"Of course it's the main concern, sweetheart. In *any* case where someone voluntarily takes on a potentially life-threatening position for the sake of another - the first consideration *must* be *how* threatened their life might become." he replied, taking a helping of bread and spreading it. "Thank you for breakfast, I was *starving*" he added, offering her some of the prepared fare on the table.
"Thank you. But how do *you* feel about this? About us?" She asked quietly. "I need to know. I care for you deeply, even in this short time. You have brought something to me that hasn't been here in a really really long time."
"I care for you too, Jana" Ben replied honestly. "but I don't have a right to influence what you decide. This is too personal. I didn't know Melanie or her fiancé and I hardly know you to be honest. What i feel is irrelevant and you shouldn't be asking because if I end up changing what you decide that would be wrong, so I *cannot* give you any indication that I'm leaning one way or the other. I can only give you a medical opinion."
Jana put her head on his shoulder. "It matters to me what you think about this Ben. It is personal but I want to be with you and so this effects you too if we are to be together. Can I have your personal opinion before your medical one? Please?"
"Are you asking me to help you raise this child?" he asked bluntly. "When you say you want us to be together, is that what you're asking me to comment on?" He wasn't entirely clear and he would have to be, before he could possibly start talking about the future for the two of them, with or without a child.
Jana sat very still for a few moments, processing her thoughts before she spoke. "I suppose I am Ben. But I dont want to lose you in the process. I want to be with you..adding the child to what we have is...it will complaticate things between us, I know that. What I feel for you is so different than I have ever felt for any other man...even...Damon. Perhaps it was because I was younger and more naive of how the world works, I don't know. Even in the short time we have been together I can't imagine you not in my life."
Ben was moved. He took her face between both of his hands and looked deep into her eyes, his face serious. "Jana" he breathed, his lips close to hers. "I want to be with you too, and I realise that means with this child as well. You don't come as a single item any more and i want you, so ..... I think we have no option but to give it our very best shot".
Her arms reached to his face, caressing his cheek as she gazed into his eyes."I don't know what I would do without you." She smiled and kissed him.
Ben looked back into her eyes and felt himself drown. "Jana..... " he began, swallowing hard, taking in air while he still could. "We hardly know each other.... if this doesn't work, there will be a child..... it's a lot to manage all at once." She was so beautiful he couldn't say no to her but his sub-conscious knew this was an act of madness so soon in their relationship.
"What if...... " was all he managed to plead before her lips met his and he was lost for all time.
"What if what?" She finally managed to say breaking the kiss but her lips hovered so close to his.
"Nothing..... " he murmoured, all his senses focussed on those lips, he was mesmerised. He leaned forward like a man who was magnetised and losing his balance against the force that drew him closer, his lips hungry for more.
"Do..you want to move this to...." She couldn't finish the words as he took more from her.
Ben reached down with his right arm and swept her legs from under her, taking the weight of her top half as she was tipped back into his waiting left arm. With her head cradled against his shoulder, her feet in the air and her arms clinging to his neck as the momentum, he lifted her high.
He thought of the time they had first kissed, when he had spun her in the holodeck. There was no room for that in these quarters but he was able to carry her into the bedroom, grinning at the way she gasped and laughed as she was thrown softly around in his arms.
He put her gently back on her feet as they reached the bedroom and bent to kiss her again, fully expecting to be chastised for having been so forward as to sweep her off her feet without warning or without allowing her to finish what she had been about to say. He adored teasing her and having her pretend to be cross with him for it. It was a game they had begun to make a habit of playing, much to his delight as it almost always ended up with a reconciliation and making up was SO much fun.
OFF:
A JP Between:
Lt Ben Kensington
ACMO - DS5 (pNPC)
and
Lt. Jana Kasikova
CSO - DS5